Guide: Therapist Dating

What can a therapist help with? 

• Longer term behavioral / emotional change 

• From https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/psychotherapy/about/pac-20384616 

  • Resolve conflicts with your partner or someone else in your life.

  • Relieve anxiety or stress due to work or other situations.

  • Cope with major life changes, such as divorce, the death of a loved one or the loss of a job.

  • Learn to manage unhealthy reactions, such as road rage or other aggressive behavior.

  • Come to terms with an ongoing or serious health issue, such as diabetes, cancer or long-term pain.

  • Recover from physical or sexual abuse or witnessing violence.

  • Sleep better if you have trouble getting to sleep or staying asleep.

A welcoming therapy room with soft lighting and a comfortable chair

Here are some articles on good questions to ask a therapist: 

• Keep in mind that finding a therapist is a little like dating, you need to think about what you need and want to work through and see if their style, expertise and approach fits you. There are also great and terrible therapists, just like doctors and they can focus on different things, approaches, or pain points. 

• I would suggest finding at least three and interviewing them. I would start with referrals from your doctors and other professional networks. 

  • Ask your ally, I can ask too within my and the ally network

  • Look at your EAP programs at your company, you might have better help, Lyra, Spring, etc. which makes it a lot easier to try and see a few

  • One good site to use is Alma and other options are psychology today and Better Help 

• General questions to ask during the first consultation with each therapist: 

  • How long have you been practicing? 

  • [What licenses and certifications do you have and which professional organizations do you belong to?]

  • What is your experience working with people with XXX? 

  • What has been your approach? 

  • What would the cadence be and for what duration do you recommend for us going forward? 

  • Are you in-network for my healthcare? If not what would the out of pocket cost be? Will you provide a super bill? 

• If any therapist wants to put you on medication of some sort, like all physical doctors, I would recommend getting a few more additional professional opinions

• Articles: 

  • Questions to ask a Therapist https://www.apa.org/ptsd-guideline/patients-and-families/finding-good-therapist

  • https://www.washingtonian.com/2016/03/03/the-14-questions-you-must-ask-a-therapist-before-your-first-appointment/

• Look at what type of therapist they are:

  • The most common types of licensed therapists are:

• Licensed professional counselors (LPCs)

• Licensed mental health counselors (LMHCs)

• Licensed marriage and family therapists (LMFTs)

• Licensed clinical social workers (LCSWs)

• Psychologists (PhDs or PsyDs) 

• Psychiatrists (MDs or DOs) - has a medical degree and can write medical leave accomodations and can prescribe medication)

• Therapist platforms that large companies have which can make trying therapists much easier and often free for up to 29 sessions a year per family member. Check with your benefits provider though: 

  • Lyra 

  • Spring Health 

  • Better Help